Did you ever watch Twin Peaks? I did. The entire series in the span of two weeks when I was in college. Every truly well rounded dark intellect I knew had seen Twin Peaks and knew the references. Hence I sat down and began to watch.

If you didn't, here's a summary: Laura Palmer was murdered. Thousands of ridiculous things happen that have little to zero connection to anything else. Enter scary red room, evil people, log, log, log, nothing makes sense, cherry pie, the end.

I'm going into Twin Peaks because Braid is even more critically acclaimed than Twin Peaks. The depth and meaning of the ending is so highly praised that I was worried about hyperbole going in. Hardcore video game/intellectual nerds I am friends with know of the game or have played it to 'mindblowing' conclusions. I had to find out for myself.

Braid



1. The Gameplay Design

2D platformer explicitly making fun of Super Mario Bros. One to two note jokes. Honestly I was bored with the puzzles fairly quickly, not enchanted and amazed as almost every reviewer would have you believe. Fora game wanting to point out how bad video games have become, [read any interview with the game designer], the game itself reminded me of hundreds of other games I've played.

2. The Art

One major selling point in all reviews is the art and music. Okay. I'm not going to rail hardcore against either but again, I wasn't entranced by the music as I was in Pan's Labyrinth. I will let you take a stab at the artwork:



3. The Story

I will concede the story was a few notches above regular video game fare. Time manipulation and destroying of worlds with the option of reversing mistakes in interpersonal relationships. It's complicated. That is agreed on. However, it isn't beyond any conversation I've had with friends/boyfriends. It isn't anything brand new in thought or process. It is holding the cards from the table. We can't see them all right now. Braid suggests that as intellectual proding. Maybe it is.

4. The One Joke I Did Like That I Haven't Seen Mentioned Anywhere

In the bathroom, the boxes on the shelf are ASDF and Z. The game is obsessed with time manipulation and my favorite time manipulation anyday is Ctrl + Z. Cute concept to mention it in this game. I need Ctrl + Z almost daily in human interactions.

Overall

Hyperbole really disheartened my playing of this game. It was alright, I had some fun bouncing around. The game designer ripped apart Resident Evil 4 as being formulaic but I found Braid to be immensely less challenging, less interesting and less fun. Is it a game changer, a must play for any intellectual gamer? I don't think so. It felt like a 2D Prince of Persia.

Uncharted 2: Among Thieves



Having now beaten the game twice, I feel very comfortable saying this game is a fantastic piece of gaming achievement. Joins the ranks of my top ten favorites games of all time.

Brief Synopsis:

Nathan Drake, beefy five oclock shadowed treasure hunter, is tracking down a giant sapphire with dangerous results. He has an Australian accomplice who flirts towards homosexual encounters more than once, two beautiful women both competing for his attention and a litany of bad guys trying to kill him. Also, treasure!

Pros:

Extremely varied gameplay
Throwing people off cliffs is fun
Exciting storyline
Sexy protagonist [especially post Doughnut. More on that to follow]
Beautiful graphics
Cursing!

Cons:

The bad guys are smart [actually a pro, makes for better gameplay but damn those shotgun assholes]
Number of bad guys [there are a ton. I mean an extreme amount of bad guys at some points. This is not a breezy game]

I loved playing this game, completed it the first time through within a 24 hour period. Now, onto something magical and special, which helped spurred the 24 hour period completion.

Doughnut Drake

Nathan Drake has the ability to be turned into the 400+ pound version of himself upon completing the game once with enough money. The skin is called Doughnut Drake and its awesome. He is just as capable of all the feats trim Drake can, though I will say, psychosomatic or not, I thought he was slower. Also his voice is deeper, a little more labored. Ha. He IS 400 lbs. There are lines written into the plot, that said when he is trim are just joking around, but when he's 400, clearly are pointing out he's fat.

I played the entire second time through as the 400 lb version of Drake and was constantly entertained/thrilled by the obese hero kicking ass and throwing himself through glass windows.

Before/After






Someone at the designer Naughty Dog, at some point, read my mind. A fat option of a beefy hero in an Indiana Jones type video game. Dream come true. I will point out, much to my dismay, that he is only fat in the actual gameplay. Any of the video sequences, he will still be trim. Bummer. Something to hope for next.

The game has been such a critical/financial success, we can definitely expect an Uncharted 3. As that they have had Doughnut Drake in both 1 and 2, we can expect a third chubby venture. Already excited.

After California and Maine, I am exhausted with the delicate discussion and 'let's wait' debate towards Obama.  Same sex marriage is not asking for civil rights. They are mandated in the historical documents that we as citizens are entitled to.  American government exists solely to protect the rights of its citizens and I feel the majority of the gay movement have forgotten that. Probably most of America has.  They are here to be sure we are free. Period.

Below is my argument and explanation of why same sex marriage is our GUARANTEED right and anyone opposed is anti-American, anti-freedom and believes in hate.

Founding Documents Support Same Sex Marriage: Declaration of Independence and the 14th Amendment

Starting at the very beginning, as movements such as the French Revolution have done, an examination of the Declaration of Independence is necessary. Most important, the Preamble.  Text follows, spaced appropriately to indicate talking points:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal [1],
 
that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights [2],

that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. [3]
 
That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted [4] among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,

That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, [5] and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

My tastes always have run to the beefy, muscular side of gaining; Holy Land consistently found in Before/After gym shots.

The best place online for these is Bodybuilding.com.  Not only do I read the site for different lifting techniques but damn if they don't have a Transformation of the Week.

The real debate on this site is whether the guys look better once they lose the weight. Obviously, I almost always say no, they were immensely hotter heavy.  I know I am biased but men tend to look better thicker.  I will admit when a guy looks better trim and it isn't grudgingly.  Take a look at this sampling of the guys featured. Almost emphatically, they look better when they were fatter:



Ears are thrilled that their plot to establish even more prominence has come to fruition.



Glasses add the final touch to Meth Addict Intellectual.



Tragedy.  That guy is gorgeous in his before.



Tragedy Part Two.  I'd maul this guy in the before.  We'd hit the gym, a buffet, then cuddle on the couch eating ice cream watching horror movies. 

To scan the bevy of posts, go here: http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/trans_m.htm

Love when my world is widened by someone else's whimsy, darkness and art:

These are my favorite of his Twisted Princess series.


Aurora



Cinderella



Snow White



The artist's gallery:

http://jeftoon01.deviantart.com/gallery/#Twisted-Princess